2002-10-08 : 12:24 p.m.
Caught without my shoe

Listening to: Ian Van Dahl, Will I?

What a way to start the freakin' day...

I step outside, ready to make the 15 min stride to the subway stop, to get to work...

It's an absolutely beautiful day... the sun is beaming, the air is chilly... perfect for a light jacket... the first of the leaves are starting to appear on the floor... aaahhh... autumn in New York... fantastic...

So I'm less then a block away from the train stop... when I swing my left foot in perfect stride... and in an instant, my foot feels awfully light...

My fucking shoe had flown off my foot and landed in the middle of the damn intersection I'm about to cross...

At first, I'm not completely thrown off by it, because it is a cute- office attire- status quo looking sandal-ish shoe for the office, and in good stride, could in perfect theory fly off as it did... so I'm thinking... "all right asshole... stop walking like you're a damn Rockette and get the shoe..." (the self nods...)

Slightly embarrassed and thankful that the man in the Lincoln continental has decided to wait a bit longer at the stop sign... so that I may get my shoe before it's run over... I hobble over with my one remaining shoe...

I trotted in haste and made sure not to make any unnecessary eye contact with the driver... I could only imagine the look on his face after seeing a shoe fly across the front of his car, six feet in the air- for no particular reason...

So I begin the decent on my awaiting shoe... and quickly noticed that to my luck.. it has landed right side up... and in my genius-ness, I'm thinking... "...Aaaahhh (mind fiddling fingers)perfect... I will just slide my foot in and continue the quick walk across the road... averting any further drama... aaahhh genius!"

So I do the deed... cross, walk, slip the foot... continue walking... yet strange?

I still feel the fucking pavement underneath my left foot... and even stranger... it's like my mind can't really make the connection... since the plan of action was flawless... so in robotic fashion, I finished crossing the street... looked down... NO FUCKING SHOE... looked back: SHOE STILL AT INTERSECTION... look at man: HE LOOKS AT SHOE, LOOKS AT ME, BASTARD LAUGHS... Me? oh, just pathetically confused... as I have obviously been tricked by a damn unloyal shoe...

So I waddle back, with that annoying half-limp, created by the extra inch in length by the remaining shoe...

I slip my foot in my work sandal... and again my foot pushes off, and remains awkwardly shoe-less yet again...

at this point... I'm just pissed, annoyed, and in serious caffeine withdrawal, as I have yet to have my morning- societal, cocaine-addictive, starbucks brand coffee... I pick the damn shoe up and discover its dirty trick...

the one dang string that holds the entire top flap of the shoe had left with the morning breeze...

my foot had no chance in hell...

so I took my remaining shoe off and stormed off bare foot, back to the other end of the street... once again not making eye contact with the man in the lincoln continental... figuring- as my mind had regressed into that toddler frame of mind- if I don't see him, he doesn't see me... and walked the whole way back home...

and kids, walking the streets of New York city- barefoot- is not pretty... dogs (and humans) are fined if not curbed for a reason...

So I go home, put on a second pair of "sandal-esk" shoes, walk back, and finally get on a train... to then think I had found redemption...

I inadvertently sat across the cutest boy and shamelessly began to stare, when he wasn't looking...

in mid peaks... I noticed him peaking back and found myself getting nervous... see, as outgoing as I may be... without an added person to help break the initial ice, I cower.

But in what was a most odd- only commercial like- moment, we caught each other’s glance and started chuckling...

But I buckled and looked away again...

Then in a moment of bravery (actually, just sheer curiosity) I looked, and noticed he had been staring at the floor??? No... wait... my feet???

Now I’m thinking… oh shit… please don’t…. no, no… don’t look at the toes… (You see… I have this slight fear of feet…. I think they’re atrocious… mine included…) and to add to that.. I hadn’t fixed the old peeling nail polish off my toes… yuck…

Mental anguish ensues: “…eeeehhhhh…. Man… oh- man… he’s lookin’ at the toes… settle… settle down, it’s not that bad… just a bad paint job… fuck it… you just gotta work the stare back… “

But to my dismay, he starts to gather his things… and gets off at the next stop…. Never , never looking my way again…

“Fuck! Had you just said something he would have never looked down at my….. what the fuck??!!!”

My feet were black… nasty… crusty- walking the streets of New York City…. Black…

Combined with my fear of disgusting feet… I thought the nausea was going to make me pass out… I couldn’t believe I had forgotten to check and consequently wash my feet… when I had gotten home to get a new pair of shoes…

Revelation for the day?

I will be single for quite some time.



previous : next

* - 2007-07-05
--------------------- - 2006-05-30
hello, goodbye - 2006-05-24
Pinky burglar - 2006-03-09
So let's go... - 2006-02-24